The National "Boxer" [2007]

Somehow these Middle-American schmucks thought they'd get one up on the similarly overly-referential Interpol by pretending to act British, the way clueless, horny idiots from Ohio usually do when they're hitting on MILFs at the singles bar. And even though the use of gloomy cellos hadn't worked for Smashing Pumpkins back in the 90s, here The National employ them again, to similar avoidably dour effect, like visiting Portland, OR when you really don't have to. I think The National is going for what R.E.M. might have sounded like had they not completely sold out, but if "Boxer" is an accurate depiction of that, then R.E.M. was better off having taken the money. That said, these guys get so depressed as this album progresses it's hard to believe they're not actually from Seattle. Vocalist Carin Besser must have earlier struck out badly with the MILFs, because he veers downward in a hurry to approach something like Mark Lanegan on sad pills. And with how often The National seems to be bent on re-doing The Killers as if they're Joy Division, they really should have called this album "Mr. Darkside." Hey, at least it would have sold better, with all the Star Wars geeks and sports-bar doofuses suddenly interested.