Led Zeppelin "IV (ZoSo)" [1971]

Thuggish, entitled, plodding, bloated and stupid, somehow these poseurs from across the pond were supposed to have created the finest work of hard rock ever. But it's not -- not by a long shot -- unless you count blatant misogyny, schizophrenic time signatures and hippies prancing with fairies worthwhile material. Packaged, as always, with useless but nevertheless annoying "artwork" attempting to depict its "poetry" as "important," beneath the surface of this epic monstrosity is, in fact, something quite profound: a yawning chasm of utter meaninglessness (unless the entire meaning is "let's give pimply American boys something to sniff glue to"). Everybody knows "Stairway to Heaven" isn't about anything, but neither are any of the other tracks, save "Rock and Roll," which is barely even a real rock 'n roll song.