My Chemical Romance "The Black Parade" [2006]

Whether or not the members of this suburban mama's boy American rock group actually ever enjoyed an actual "chemical romance," it's clear whatever happened could not nearly change their metabolism enough to create any good music. Playing fast and throwing in a couple minor chords is woefully insufficient in keeping anyone actually listening from recognizing these guys are a bunch of pencil-necked sports bar creeps at heart. Not that their major label would ever have any inclination about such an anti-aesthetic (though I'm sure their A&R guy told them to ditch the baseball caps) -- sports-bar creeps may be the most desirable demographic for wasting the most disposable income in actual dollar amounts. Meanwhile, calling their album "Black Parade" would seem to indicate the scariest place My Chemical Romance might imagine themselves: being trampled to death by a funky inner-city marching band.