Eric B. & Rakim "Paid In Full" [1987]

Rapper Rakim is an absolute marvel to behold: it's entirely possible that no one in this history of humanity has used more syllables to say less. Endlessly bragging how he wins all the rap contests (mm-hmm) and is seriously dedicated about working as a rapper (fo' reals?), that he actually writes his words down before he raps (aw hell nawww!) and expects to get paid for his performances (psshh!) becomes downright tedious after about the first minute or so. Even worse, his generic 80s DJ Eric B. sounds like Marley Marl falling into the toilet. Cheap Cosby Show-era beats, scratches and samples both date "Paid In Full" terribly and suggest that the early backlash against hip-hop had less to do with racism than with quality control. Even further, that rapping is really not about anything but a minimalist "art movement" akin to an entire gallery displaying canvases with a single drab color painted on each one. What else can explain a 6+ minute track of staccato monotone entitled "My Melody," unless it's all a sublime joke?