The Zombies "Odessey and Oracle" [1968]

Turns out there were plenty of options for music listeners in the 60s, particularly if you were of the opinion The Turtles were too radically harsh and non-commercial for your tastes. "Odessey and Oracle" might even have made Don Kirshner's head explode if he weren't already conspiring within the industry to foist saccharine insults like The Monkees and The Archies on everybody. This is the kind of record that makes you realize how hairy Simon & Garfunkel's balls were (in a good way, actually). "Odessey and Oracle" is the Beach Boys strained into baby food, Procol Harum sleepwalking. The singing here makes Nico, by comparison, sound like she had a penis. How Britain itself was not invaded and demolished upon this album's release only proves how few people ever bought it -- all except critics, who were likely contractually bound to give it a good write-up so the Zombies' major label wouldn't shrivel up on the spot. Jesus, this is one painful listen: bring your ear close and you'll hear the Mamas and the Papas laughing at how dickless these guys are.