Barry White "Can't Get Enough" [1974]

"Can't Get Enough" -- enter Barry White fat joke here. Ultimately, it's hard to fault this hippopotamus in a leisure suit from trying to get over on the ladies any way he can, so naturally he leads with that deep, deep speaking voice. But singing-wise is another matter: he sounds like he just ate Lou Rawls. We got into a seriously gross glossiness in mid-70s soul music, and not only "Can't Get Enough" but pretty much all Barry White albums typify this cotton candy lewdness that took over the genre until record labels could figure out how to sell disco without using homosexuals. White is very, very hetero, even though his vast and ridiculous orchestrations sound like Isaac Hayes under three tons of birthday cake frosting. In retrospect, it seems very difficult to believe people actually did the nasty to this record without doubling over with laughter. The strings, synths, backup vocals, et. al. have more goop all over them than whatever Barry processed his hair with, and his lyric sheet reads like a series of overly sentimental wedding anniversary cards for male numbskulls who have zero ability to articulate themselves. And if women think the soundtrack men have in their heads while contemplating the women they love sounds anything at all like Barry White music, then their disappointment with the opposite sex is extremely well-deserved.