The Killers "Hot Fuss" [2004]

Contemptibly annoying as 80s/90s band The Cure was, imagine those guys exponentially more whiny, monotonous and tedious and you'll approach the ballpark of hell in which The Killers reside. Unconvincing fake British accents resembling that obnoxious drunk frat boy who won't stop hitting on you, this band of poseurs manages to combine every bad instinct about pop music production of the past 30 years: woeful synth patches over sports-bar guitar progressions, spoiled nasal fucktard begging for nookie and a phony U2 arena-rock sheen. Not sure who they think they're fooling by calling themselves The Killers; these guys are about as dangerous as an over-cologned pack of singles bar doofuses. They should have called themselves "Quest for Blowjob," though that would have required at least a modicum of self-awareness.