Vampire Weekend "Vampire Weekend" [2008]

Gee, if I wanted to listened to partially-digested South African riffs lifted straight from Paul Simon's jungle-fever phase mixed with magic elf prancing and shellacked in a preppy sheen, I'd offer some undergrads partial credit to develop a useless new form of annoying music. This is essentially what Vampire Weekend accomplishes, except I never would have unleashed these horribly precious morsels onto the listening public, like these self-important Millennial mama's boys did. When they're not being tediously referential, they milk commercial-jingle melodies that would make a nursery school teacher gag. If it's that important for you to dance with stuck-up blonde girls from Connecticut at the yacht club mixer, enter at your own risk. Otherwise, why bother?